We just had parent orientation at our school yesterday. It was an exhausting and exhilarating affair.
The goal of an orientation is, yes, to orient parents to the new rules and procedures, but it also is a somewhat gentrified pep rally. We are excited! We are ready! Listen to the host of wonders we are going to put your child through!
Parents, friends, and random strangers always comment on my passion. It is infectious and boisterous and loud. I do not lack for showing enthusiasm about Greek or science or drama. I am quirky and interesting. You want your child to learn from me.
But I hate orientation for this. I am generating a lot of passion, a lot of vim and vigor, for these wonderful things that I hope to happen. But what if they don't? Sure, I don't promise anything, but I publish my dreams to my students and their parents and they drink my purple koolaid. They put their expectations on my inflated passion.
Today, I woke up and I was too exhausted to lesson plan, too exhausted to go for my morning jog. This is the person who you are putting your expectations in? If it weren't for knowing that Christ will get me through this, that in 10 months it will, one way or another, be over, I would probably go insane.
I do not lack for passion, but I worry that I lack action. Will we get four performances in this year? Will we qualify for the Shakespeare festival? Will our Science Fair happen? Will I be able to teach all the facts and lead all the discussions I hope to? Will I be a good teacher? Will my students be prepared for the next level of all their classes? I don't know. I hope so, but I don't.
I hope my passion can be translated into action, but I am scared that it won't.
2 comments:
The worst class I ever took in college began with the GA teaching the course saying something to this effect: "I know most of you are just here for the gen ed credit, and you don't actually care about anthropology, so just do the assignments, show up, and we can all get through this pretty painlessly." Worst. Class. Ever.
You won't accomplish all you hoped. We never do. But you will accomplish a lot of it, and far more than a passionless person would expect. And above all, keep in mind that merely being around your passion is good for these kids. In many respects, it is an end in itself. In that department, I am confident you will deliver as promised, and more.
When you know what you will teach and deliver is right, go all out to do it.
Put your dream across and have fun!
I know you'll deliver more than what you've in mind.
Good luck!
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